Summer Daze

Editor’s Note: the editor doesn’t make notes.

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It happens every year and faster than the year before: blink and the summer’s gone.

Ok summer’s not really gone. We have over a month before the calendar officially marks the fall season, and here in sunny, thirsty NorCal it’ll be a month or more past that before it really starts feeling “fally.” But annual events have a way of tricking our brains into coinciding with things, and for me – when the new school year starts up, it feels like the coroner just announced it: “Summer 2022, time of death: August 9th.”

Last week marked the beginning of the new school year for many k-12-ers. Since my kids are all grown and out of the house (the selfish bastards) I was oblivious as to when the schools were starting back up but figgered it would be at least another week or two. But nope – some in my area started on Tuesday the 9th, others on Wed the 10th.

Whaaaaa?

Oh I know – the old days when school started the day after Labor Day are long gone, but even so – is it reaaally necessary for kids to be in classes this early? I remember my kids having to start back up on August 20-something. Then it became August “teenth” something. Nowadays there’s no guarantee that the ‘something’ will even be double digits.

It oughta be illegal.

Since the fall school semester will no doubt continue starting earlier and earlier, perhaps some change is in order.

If you’ve been walking the planet for any length of time, you know that the older we get, the faster the days and years seem to fly by. To combat this, I propose adding another month to the calendar year. It’s ingenious really. We can debate as to when the new month should be added but I think summer is best. After May? Before July? Right smack in the middle of June? It doesn’t matter, but maybe it’ll help trick our minds into thinking life isn’t zooming by so fast after all.

And since it’s my idea, I’ll take the liberty of naming the new month.

“Cavemanber” comes to mind.

Ok it’s official, but try not to blink so often.

At this rate, Cavemanber 2023 will be here before we know it.